Years, lovers and glasses of wine must never be counted

Another year has passed. My quest to seek the meaning of life and true source of happiness continues. A question oftentimes pop up my mind, what would you do if you get a chance to design your life the way you want. Would you still choose to do the same work? Would you prefer more friends or solitude? Who would you want to wake beside to? Would you stop chasing money and start earning experiences instead? Possibilities are endless.

I wish life had a pause button so that I could enjoy precious moments longer. It has been said that when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to make it true. I wonder why it never works with me.

If I paint the picture of 2019 highlights, it would be rendered quite vivid and colorful. 5 countries, few photography accolades (invited for guest talk at photography exhibition and others) and encounter with a sweet girl.
Experiencing coldest day of my life, -13 degrees Celsius in the Swiss Alps and much awaited family vacation after 16 long years were icing on the cake.

However, there weren’t only sunshine and roses. I had my own share of rains and thorns too. There was a time when my life became directionless. I didn’t enjoy the work like I did before. The girl I was talking to vanished. Photography didn’t fascinate me anymore. There was nothing much to look forward to. I vividly remember spending days staring at the ceiling of my room doing nothing. These are the kind of days when you contemplate on missing aspects of life, chances you took, opportunities you missed, decisions you regret, people you lost, moments you wish to relive, successes, failures, so on and so forth.

Here is a list of 21 things I learned in 2019:

1. People always leave
2. You don’t find excellence. You build it and then it takes you places
3. Financial knowledge is something you can’t ignore. You are gonna need it at some point in life. And when you do, you would regret how much you have already lost
4. Sometimes you give your best and yet you fail
5. Things can go well when you least expect it
6. Sooner or later you succeed. You just need to keep trying
7. Some things in life are inevitable. You can’t change them no matter how hard you try. But you can always prepare to minimize surprises
8. Never lose people who were with you in the dark times. That’s when you know their true colors
9. Life of chances always trumps life with regrets. Wear confidence, take calculated risks and be expressive. Had I done it 5 years ago, my life would have been different
10. Trust is a rare thing in this world. Truth is, people who harm you are the ones you put most of your trust in. They change and so do their behavior towards you
11. If you have a secret, don’t tell anyone
12. You can be a nice guy and yet lose the girl
13. When you feel left out, there is always a community out there you can connect to
14. You always sacrifice one thing at the expense of other. It’s a zero sum game
15. You are human. You can’t work with the same efficiency all the time. But people would expect you to
16. Sometimes you don’t measure up to your own past performances
17. Family trips are awesome. You should do it whenever you get the chance
18. Buy only what you need
19. Car is not an investment. It’s an expense at the cost of comfort and luxury
20. Family, friends, work, hobbies — You get to choose any three
21. Life rarely unfolds the way you plan and anticipate

Happy new year! And remember, Years, Lovers and Glasses of wine… these are the things never to be counted.

12 things I learned in 2017

Copyright © 2019, Aashish Barnwal,  All rights reserved.